Ron & Joanna
John 10:10 tells us that the thief (Satan) comes only to
steal and kill and destroy. The thief almost stole, killed, and destroyed
our marriage. We can testify that what Satan meant for our harm in trying
to destroy our marriage, God turned around for our good. When you read the
complete verse in John 10:10, you will find God’s plan for your life.
His plan for you reads, "I am come that they might have life, and
that they might have it more abundantly."
I had been a pastor for eight years, and I didn’t
REALLY know the Word. I was preaching and ministering, and people were
getting saved and healed by the scores, but I still didn’t KNOW the
uncompromising Word of God. The Lord put my wife, Joanna, and me into a
situation where we counseled untold numbers of couples. We never lost a
marriage because we always directed them to the Word of God . . . until it
came to our marriage. Then, what we taught others, we couldn’t apply to
ourselves.
It seemed like we had everything going for us in our
ministry, but in our home there was strife and chaos. At church, I would
preach, and my wife would sing, but if the people could only see us at
home. We knew that our marriage was in trouble, but who does a pastor go
to that he can trust? We were so desperate that we got out the yellow
pages and searched for clergy, but we could not find one who would stand
in faith for our marriage.
I loved the Lord with all my heart and wanted
desperately to serve Him and to please Him. But I began hearing the voice
of the enemy whispering to me, "If you didn’t have to put up with
‘her’ and the burden she is to you and you had someone better who
would flow in your ministry, boy, would your ministry grow!" Satan
had planted a thought and my fall began when I started entertaining the
thought. What you feed grows, and the more I thought on the seed Satan had
planted, the less I thought on God. I didn’t go out and get drunk or
find another woman or leave the ministry. All I did was entertain Satan’s
thoughts, and those thoughts destroyed me.
Satan soon saw to it that the woman I THOUGHT would be
just what I needed for my ministry came across my path. I preached against
strife in the pulpit, and I decided I didn’t need all my wife’s
problems. It would be easier to avoid strife by marrying someone who didn’t
have problems that caused strife (Satan is the master of deceit).
I made the statement to my wife that many of you have
heard from your mate, "I just need some time to get off by myself and
think. This won’t be permanent. I just need some space." I was
lying to her and planning some things that were wrong. I was totally
confused and locked into the situation.
I left the ministry because I knew that what I wanted to
do was wrong and I loved God too much to stay. Up until I left the
ministry, my sin had only been that of entertaining wrong thoughts. But
now that the pretense was over, I left my wife and family and
"she" left her husband and family. We moved to another city to
start a new life together. I found a job as a counselor for a girls’
detention home. But I was the one who needed the counseling.
One night, I decided I was going to go to church. As I
sat there in the pew, holding the Bible I had used when I was pastor,
memories flooded over me and I wept and wept and wept. I wanted to be back
home with my family. Let me tell you, those who have left want to come
back home; they just don’t know how. I just didn’t know how to go back
to my wife. It was chaos living with this other person who I thought could
solve all my problems. I yearned to be back home with my wife and kids.
Meanwhile at home, Joanna had been interceding for Ron.
Like many whose husbands have left the home, Joanna got crowded to Jesus.
Before she didn’t really have her OWN faith, but had relied on her
husband’s faith. When Ron left, she just fell apart . . . right into God’s
arms. The Lord supernaturally fed and taught her. She was totally ignorant
of God’s Word and didn’t even know that it was God’s will to heal
her marriage.
As Joanna shares her story, she explains what happened.
I had been praying, "God, if it be your will, heal my marriage."
God sent a Nazarene pastor to me and he explained how it was God’s will
to heal my marriage. Malachi 2:14-16 tells us, "the Lord has been
witness between you and the wife of thy youth, with whom you have dealt
treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant. For
the Lord God of Israel says that He HATES divorce." I really got
serious in intercessory prayer then. God spoke to my heart and said,
"If I can get just one partner to stand, I can heal their
marriage." I shouted, "THAT’S ME!" God then said,
"If you will be faithful to me and to your husband, I WILL heal your
marriage." Every place I went, I announced, "Did you know that
God is going to heal my marriage?" And He did!!! Praise the Lord!
Ron continues with their story: There were times when
Joanna was interceding for me and believing that I would be home soon,
when Satan would lay traps for me and I would go in the other direction. I
could feel her prayers and I was MOST MISERABLE! I was working five jobs
by this time to try and find something that would satisfy. I had
everything I ever wanted. I was prospering . . . prospering . . .
prospering . . . it seemed. I had $100 bills in my wallet, an expense
account, a brand new car, and LOTS of problems.
I was so desperate that even though I knew I could go
back home anytime, I tried to commit suicide. The enemy had me bound, and
I wanted to die. God sent a preacher to rescue me the day I tried to kill
myself.
During this time, I wasn’t a hypocrite. I told
everybody that I was backslidden, that my wife was right and I was wrong.
In the beginning of my fall, all the feelings I had ever had for my wife
left. I remember telling a friend, "I’ll go to hell before I’ll
go back to my wife." I even thought of killing Joanna to get free of
her and her prayers. My wife just kept right on interceding for me. It
would make me furious if she would preach to me when I called on the
phone. I had enough guilt and I sure didn’t need for her to put more
guilt on me. I would cuss her out and slam that phone down. Me - a
preacher - incredulous!
My divorce was not final yet, but the other woman’s
divorce finally came through, and by then we had no desire to get married.
But we were going to get married anyway, as soon as possible. I didn’t
know how to get out of it. Satan had me bound.
My wife Joanna had written to a TV evangelist asking him
to agree in prayer that her marriage was healed and that her husband was
coming home. He wrote back, "Joanna, you have to get your life lined
up with the Word of God. You have some attitude problems and some
priorities that are out of place. You need to seek God first and His way,
instead of DEMANDING "I want my husband back and that is the ONLY
thing I am going to think about and that is the ONLY thing I am going to
talk about." This man of God encouraged her to get herself ready for
me to come home. It’s sad, but true that the only way a lot of Standers
prepare for their mate’s return is to keep an eye on the front door,
hoping their mate will appear in the doorway. Instead, they need to ask
God to open their eyes to their own faults and shortcomings and pet sins.
And then with the help of the Lord, CHANGE! You can only change you, you
can’t change the other person.
When Joanna was told she needed to change some
attitudes, she sought the Lord and prayed. Finally she came to the point
where she could say to God and really mean it, "God if my husband
never comes home to me, I will still serve you."
The other woman’s husband committed suicide, and she
left immediately and flew back to Ohio. The same day Joanna called to tell
me she was driving out here to Oklahoma to see me. I told her, "Well,
you can come out here if you want to, it doesn’t matter. I’m still
divorcing you." I really didn’t want to marry the other woman, but
I had no feelings for my wife.
By now, I was doing everything I had ever preached
against. I even became a drunk. I drank morning, noon, and night. I drove
truck and drank while I drove. I didn’t care about anything or anybody.
I was a stranger even to myself.
In the meantime, my heart was breaking because the other
woman stayed in Ohio after the funeral, and didn’t come back to me. So,
in order to save money, I moved in with my wife. I refused to be a part of
our marriage . . . all I needed was a davenport to sleep on. I don’t
know how I ever got up the courage, but one day I went to my wife with
this announcement, "Joanna, this doesn’t change a thing between you
and me, but I need a friend. My heart is breaking." She said, "I’ll
be your friend." I literally laid my head down on my wife’s
shoulder while she held me as I sobbed and cried over another woman. That’s
a strong lady, but she didn’t get that way overnight. She had spent her
time reading the Word of God and praying.
I was still struggling with old desires, so I decided to
fly out to Ohio to see the other person. I found out later that Joanna had
anointed all my clothes for the trip. God took care of my plans because
the other person never showed up at the airport to pick me up. I had told
my wife that I would be gone three days, so rather than fly right back
home, I spent the next three days at the airport moving from seat to seat,
trying to make it appear that I was just passing through the airport.
Afterwards I got back on the plane and "my friend," Joanna, met
me.
The Affair was Over!!
During this time I had gone to churches and I had gone
to the altar and had talked to pastors, trying to get back with the Lord.
Suddenly, it was like a ray of light came in and the Lord said, "Have
you had enough of what Satan is putting you through? If you want to come
back, just ask and I’ll accept you back." I said, "Father, I’m
sorry. Please forgive me of my sins. Lord, I am not worthy. If you never
put me back in ministry again, it’s okay."
At that point in time when I said, "Forgive me,
Lord," instantly all my love for my wife came rushing back into my
heart. I couldn’t wait to see Joanna to tell her I loved her. In the
meantime, our divorce had become final, so I had the privilege of marrying
my wife twice. Now, our marriage just gets better and better and better.
There is no marriage too hard for the Lord to heal. He healed ours!! And
YES, God did restore me to the ministry.
FOR I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU, SAYS THE LORD. THEY
ARE PLANS FOR GOOD, NOT FOR EVIL, TO GIVE YOU A FUTURE AND A HOPE. JEREMIAH
29:11
Ron and Joanna
Oklahoma
This testimony provided by:
NEW HOPE FOR BROKEN
MARRIAGES
Dana & Val Hartong
24652 Featherstone Road
Sturgis, Michigan 49091
(269) 651-2187 |
